Divorce and custody battles are emotionally challenging on their own, but when you add a hostile co-parent, the situation becomes even more stressful. You need to be careful with what you say and do while in the midst of a high-conflict divorce, both in and out of the courtroom. Your actions will be under a microscope, and everything you do can impact your divorce case. If you’re unsure how to survive a high-conflict divorce in Columbia, it’s wise to partner with an experienced attorney.
What Does High-Conflict Mean in a Divorce?
A high-conflict divorce is characterized by one or both parties refusing to cooperate, leading to a lengthy battle that is often more destructive than it is productive. Parents typically spend more time placing blame on each other and arguing than working to reach an amicable agreement. High-conflict divorces go beyond two people disliking each other. They often involve a deep-seated animosity that makes it nearly impossible to create parenting plans and other agreements without the intervention of the court.
High-conflict battles make up 5% to 25% of divorces. Hostility in these cases can take many forms. Parties may attempt to manipulate each other or others involved, weaponize legal tools like restraining orders, alienate the other parent, or make false claims in court.
Know Your Rights
One way to deal with a high-conflict divorce case is to know your rights before you ever appear in court. You have the right to receive notice of hearings and filings, to be heard in court, to call witnesses and provide material evidence, and to have representation. Columbia divorce laws can be complicated, so it’s smart to consult a lawyer to understand your rights. A divorce attorney can help protect your rights and ensure your voice is heard in court.
Prioritize Your Child’s Best Interests
As you enter into your custody battle, it’s important to remain focused on your child’s best interests. About a third of children in the U.S. experience divorce, and it’s important to protect them throughout the process. It’s not about winning; it’s about doing what’s right for your child.
Even if the other parent is more interested in fighting you, you should dedicate yourself to fighting for what your child needs. This demonstrates your fitness as a parent to the court, which helps your case for custody. Focus on child-centered plans that respect the relationship with the other parent. Try to show how you’re involved in your child’s life and how you can provide stability for them.
Maintain Control of Your Emotions
From the moment you enter the courtroom in the Circuit Court of Boone County, everything you do will be under scrutiny. It’s important that you maintain your composure and control your emotions. You’ll want to show the court that you can provide stability for your child. If you let your emotions get the better of you and wind up arguing with your co-parent, the court will look down on this.
Take the time you need to process your emotions before reacting. When in court, stick to the facts rather than your feelings. It’s natural to feel angry, upset, and overwhelmed, but if you lose control of those emotions, you’ll likely end up hurting your case.
Keep Records of Communication
If you’re in the middle of a divorce or custody battle with a hostile co-parent, you should keep a record of all communications with them. Don’t discuss anything over the phone or in person. Try to keep all correspondence about the case in written forms of communication, like text, email, or a dedicated app. This not only helps you show how the other parent is unwilling to cooperate, but it also protects you from false allegations.
FAQs
How Do You Respond to a Hostile Co-Parent?
Ideally, you should respond to a hostile co-parent via written correspondence like text, email, or communication apps. Always try to meet their hostility with facts, delivered in a calm and straightforward manner. Stooping to their level is counterproductive, and it could negatively impact your case. Keep messages short, stick to only the necessary details, and direct them to contact your lawyer if you’re unsure how to respond.
How Do You Deal With a Toxic Co-Parent?
When a co-parent is being toxic, create a record of the behavior to show the court. Save texts or emails, screenshot messages or social media posts, and write down notes from conversations you have with them. This information will help you in court to demonstrate your fitness as a parent. If you feel their toxicity is becoming threatening, you can petition the court for a temporary protective order.
How Do You Win a High-Conflict Divorce?
It’s important to remember that winning a divorce isn’t about beating your ex-spouse but rather securing a sustainable future for yourself and your family. Make sure you document everything that could be relevant to the case–communications, finances, etc. It’s also smart to work with an experienced divorce attorney. They’ll be familiar with the state’s laws and local court procedures, and they can guide you throughout the case.
What Are the 3 Cs of Divorce?
The three Cs of divorce are communication, cooperation, and compromise. You’ll want to have an open, honest dialogue with your ex-partner throughout the process, and you should work together to create an agreement that is mutually beneficial to everyone involved. Especially when children are involved, it’s essential to follow these three Cs to make the process as stress-free as possible.
Hire a Divorce Lawyer From Stange Law Firm
It’s never easy going through a divorce, especially when children are involved. When you’re dealing with a hostile ex-spouse, the situation becomes even more stressful. Luckily, you don’t have to go through it alone. Hire a divorce lawyer who focuses on high-conflict divorces to help you navigate the process, protect your rights, and fight for your child’s interests. Contact the Stange Law Firm to discuss your case and learn how we can help you.
